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src="/images/wap.jpg" /></a></span></p> </div> <div id="9ntvbhf" class="det_content" id="zoom"> <p></p> <div id="l3lh3vx" class=ggad></div> <p> 　　學(xué)者們忠告說(shuō)：把八卦看作是一種社交技能而非性格缺陷更可取。雖然你可能厭惡這玩意兒，但祖先們就是這么干的。美國(guó)諾克斯學(xué)院心理系教授弗蘭克?麥克安德魯指出，“八卦愛(ài)好者”并非流行文化的產(chǎn)物，而是古已有之。先民們?cè)诮⑸缃蝗ψ拥倪^(guò)程中就有心理上的強(qiáng)烈動(dòng)機(jī)，對(duì)周圍人的生活保持密切的關(guān)注，以此更好地對(duì)抗未知風(fēng)險(xiǎn)、獲取資源。因此，著迷于他人的“八卦”早就在我們的基因上打下烙印。你可以說(shuō)，我們的每一個(gè)毛孔都散發(fā)著八卦的氣味。 <br/>　　也就是說(shuō)，對(duì)“八卦”的熱衷從進(jìn)化適應(yīng)性上來(lái)講，是優(yōu)勢(shì)品質(zhì)，史前祖先的生活范圍狹窄，在穴居時(shí)代，他們必須與團(tuán)體成員合作以抵抗外敵，但在獲取有限資源時(shí)，內(nèi)部成員又是主要的競(jìng)爭(zhēng)對(duì)手，祖先們必須記住誰(shuí)是可靠的合作者，誰(shuí)又是騙子：了解誰(shuí)是生育能力強(qiáng)的配偶；學(xué)會(huì)如何經(jīng)營(yíng)友誼、聯(lián)盟和家庭關(guān)系。天啊，早期的人類在政治、社會(huì)學(xué)方面，天生地會(huì)利用八卦知識(shí)來(lái)繁衍子孫。 <br/>　　現(xiàn)在，我們的辦公室流言，熱衷的范圍無(wú)外乎熟人社會(huì)的一部分。當(dāng)然，名人也是熟人社會(huì)的�？�。雖然他們離我們的生活甚遠(yuǎn)，但卻是飯桌上永久的話題，充當(dāng)了談?wù)摰拿浇槲铩o(wú)論是陳冠希還是文懷沙，―旦被媒介傳播之后，其纖毫畢現(xiàn)的身體或是品性，恍如身邊的一個(gè)不曾謀面的MSN熟人。 <br/>　　在辦公室中，人們總是傾向于關(guān)注上司的八卦，原因很簡(jiǎn)單，一方面通過(guò)八卦途徑可以使自己與上級(jí)的心理平等感覺(jué)建立：另一方面，又可以通過(guò)對(duì)八卦信息的交換與獵取，使自己在辦公室政治與辦公室恩怨中，處于不敗之地。 <br/>　　而對(duì)比自己職位低的人則毫無(wú)興趣。比如前臺(tái)，除非她正在獵食過(guò)程中擊敗了秘書(shū)，而與總經(jīng)理有一腿。這時(shí)候，八卦就該升溫了。 <br/>　　另外，對(duì)于與自己有利害關(guān)系的同級(jí)，八卦與流言則更是橫行無(wú)忌。同級(jí)、同行、同一專業(yè)人士的圈子是滋生嫉妒、艷羨、滿足精神勝利法的土壤。不了解八卦簡(jiǎn)直無(wú)法立足與生存。 <br/>　　英國(guó)利物浦大學(xué)的心理學(xué)家羅賓?鄧巴說(shuō)：“閑聊是聯(lián)結(jié)社會(huì)團(tuán)體的一種機(jī)制，作用類似于靈長(zhǎng)類動(dòng)物之間的相互梳理�！比祟惖慕�(jīng)驗(yàn)證明，對(duì)他人隱私的強(qiáng)烈興趣，備受自然選擇的青睞，因?yàn)椤澳馨素浴闭f(shuō)明了具備預(yù)測(cè)和影響他人行為的社會(huì)智商。 <br/>　　如此看來(lái)，“能八”也是一種人格魅力，甚至可以引入成為繼智商、情商之后的第三商：八卦商。八卦的技巧在于意味深長(zhǎng)、欲言又止，但“我只告訴你一個(gè)”是最大的謊言，“我答應(yīng)你不跟別人說(shuō)?”是次大的謊言。人們?cè)谶@樣的謊言中結(jié)成了利益共同體，―旦發(fā)現(xiàn)伙伴每次跟不同的人都說(shuō)相同的警語(yǔ)時(shí)，那牢不可破的心靈締結(jié)遭遇摧殘，便成為流言里隨波逐流的一分子。 <br/>　　“曖昧”一詞的出現(xiàn)給八卦提供了巨大的溫床。曖昧介于是與不是、似可非可之間。這個(gè)臨界狀態(tài)的詞匯包羅萬(wàn)象。你無(wú)法運(yùn)用“澄清”一說(shuō)。人們的邏輯是這樣的：沒(méi)有的事你干嘛澄清啊。因此，流言讓它飛短流長(zhǎng)，八卦讓它自生自滅�？慈丝撮L(zhǎng)線、看本質(zhì)，不能讓八卦一葉障目。 <br/>　　“珍惜生活，遠(yuǎn)離八卦”，事實(shí)上很難做到，除非那些做大事的人，珍惜時(shí)間，把別人用來(lái)喝咖啡聊“八卦”的時(shí)間，都用到創(chuàng)作上去了�？墒侨硕紵o(wú)法避免兩件事：要么“八”別人，要么被別人“八”。名人們不用動(dòng)怒，你選擇了被別人“八”的生活，就不要遷怒于宋祖德。 <br/>　　時(shí)不時(shí)釋放一些八卦消息，在社會(huì)學(xué)家看來(lái)，有利于“促進(jìn)群體團(tuán)結(jié)、增強(qiáng)群體規(guī)范、保證個(gè)體平衡”。美國(guó)南加利福尼亞大學(xué)的人類學(xué)家克里斯托弗?貝姆就說(shuō)：“通過(guò)流言蜚語(yǔ)、嘲笑奚落和排斥放逐來(lái)操縱控制公共輿論，已經(jīng)成為抵制群體中出現(xiàn)潛藏的主導(dǎo)個(gè)體的主要手段�！� <br/>　　八卦行為學(xué)的研究先驅(qū)是加拿大人杰爾姆?巴爾科、這位人類學(xué)家總結(jié)說(shuō)：“八卦尤為關(guān)注與自己生活緊密相關(guān)的人：競(jìng)爭(zhēng)對(duì)手、生活伴侶、親戚朋友、社交伙伴及時(shí)我們產(chǎn)生影響的上級(jí)人士，但在選擇上，對(duì)上級(jí)和競(jìng)爭(zhēng)對(duì)手的負(fù)面新聞更感興趣，因?yàn)檫@對(duì)我們有利：有關(guān)親友，則更樂(lè)于傳播正面信息�！卑素允蔷謨�(nèi)人的事，如果沒(méi)人找你聊八卦，說(shuō)明你還不在這個(gè)圈子，你未被接受與取得信任，你被一腳踢開(kāi)了，省省吧，溜墻根的人。 </p><p 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